WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

Karl Marx:
         It was a historical inevitability.

Hippocrates:
         Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its pancreas.

Thomas de Torquemada:
         Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Nietzsche:
         Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road gazes
         also across you.

Albert Einstein:
         Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the
         chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Buddha:
         If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature.

Salvador Dali:
         The Fish.

Darwin:
         It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.

Ernest Hemingway:
         To die.  In the rain.

Elmer Fudd:
  He cwossed the woad to kill the wabbit. 

Bonus

Darth Vader: 
 (Whshhhhhhhhsh) Because it could not resist the power of the 
 Dark Side.
Martin Luther King: 
 It had a dream.

James Tiberius Kirk: 
 To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.